You Can Believe In Magic, Only So Long As It's Our Magic

Being a Long Islander, I suppose it is inevitable that some of my friends from high school on Facebook are big fans of the so-called Long Island Medium.  These Facebook friends also identify themselves as being Roman Catholic.

So it was with interest that this afternoon on my lunch break while looking for any articles on the Internet about attempts to debunk her that I came across this little gem from the Long Island Catholic.

The author of the column, whose name is unknown to me, laments the "the popularity of a new TV show called “Long Island Medium” that has been airing for a few weeks on TLC."

So, what's the problem, according to the nameless Catholic columnist?

"The woman purports to be able to speak to the dead. This is problematic on a few levels, the most important being that it is a mortal sin to try to contact the dead."

Oh, and "The other problem is that she is not really believable as a medium."

Seriously?  That's like telling someone at a restaurant, "The organic cheeseburger you've just been served contains enough e. coli bacteria to kill you in less than 24 hours.  And by the way, the cheese they used isn't really organic."

But our intrepid Catholic columnist doesn't want to stray too far off topic.

"My intention... is to try to alert some of the people who consider themselves practicing Catholics and let them know that to use the services of a psychic, an empath, Reiki master, medium, psychic healer, or any occultist is to put your soul in danger. It amazes me to see how popular it is now to have a “reading” with these people who are at best stealing your money and at worst communing with demons."

Yep, it's bad enough all you suckers who go to fortune tellers that you're getting ripped off.  Your tarot card reader might also be consorting with malevolent spirits!

In case you might not be giving this the consideration it's due:

"You might think that that is a serious exaggeration on my part but nothing could be further from the truth."

I suddenly thought of that scene from National Lampoon's Animal House where Donald Sutherland as the literature professor is telling his students that some of them still owe him a term paper as they bolt out of the class at the ring of the bell, causing him to blurt out "I'm serious!  This is my job, you know!"

Lest you think the Catholic columnist does not have the requisite authority for his or her position, he/she adds this Bible verse:

“Let no one be found among you who sacrifices his son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. Anyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord” (Deut. 18:10–12, NIV)

That's right.  Having a reading with the Long Island Medium is just as awful as burning one of your kids to death!  It says so right there in the Bible!  What more proof do you need?

So what's a Catholic who is feeling down in the dumps about the loss of a loved one supposed to do?  Oh, that's easy!  The Our Domestic Church columnist makes it plain and simple.

"If you are Catholic and need comfort and guidance your first stop should not be a TV medium or storefront psychic, it should be the Church."

I wonder how my Catholic Facebook fans of the Long Island Medium would react to this column.  I strongly suspect they would ignore the columnist's exhortations and continue as they have before with their cafeteria Catholicism.